Posting again

Ah, well, here we go again. Two years later and I'm still a student, though this time slightly less demoralised. I'm not sure what I want to use this space for - I needed the account for something else and had to reactivate the account. I'm do an MA at the moment, so perhaps I will use this to sort my thoughts on my dissertation (Torture as an Absolute Right: an Investigation into Secondary Obligations of States under article 3 of the European Convention of Human Rights - snappy title, eh?).

As for the suburban escape...well, it seems to have succeeded to a degree. Teenage naivety and ennui (a pretentious word for a pretentious attitude) have ebbed somewhat as I realise I am indeed suburban and middle-class and that Pulp's Common People is written about people exactly like myself who try to be something they are not. So rather than insulting myself and everyone around me, I think it is time to discard pretention and be who I am. At the moment, that involves studying human rights, and generally being academically highminded about things, which is itself tragically bourgeois.

Somehow, however, I seem to have been able to combine a restlessness that (however stereotypically) followed from the trapped feeling of my social background I felt a few years ago with something that actually could be productive. Possibly because even though what I'm doing now is still perhaps a fairly stereotypical rebellion, I have accepted that stereotypes exist for a reason, and trying to escape them in itself often leads only to other cliches and it's better just to embrace the path your instinct leads you to rather than to analyse it yet (ironic, considering I've just written 300 words doing exactly that).

I credit Tom, my possibly-better half, for a reappreciation of myself, which is strange as a lot of the time I feel inferior for the extremely dull-by-comparison life which I have led. However, he met me at a time when I was trying to being more spontaneous and open-minded and has without realising it provided momentum and enthusiasm to continue in that vein. I only hope that he doens't wake up one day and feel I've held him back.